Igrot Kodesh · Letter 1595 — Shidduchim

By the grace of Hashem,

26 Iyar 5712,

Brooklyn,

Greetings and blessings,

I received, in its time, your letter, in which you inform me that you have become engaged to the young man, Chassid* who fears Hashem, Rav … You request my blessing that your union may be sealed at a good and fruitful moment. You also tell me that you are not from a Chassidic family and that you therefore do not have great knowledge of what you ought to know. Nevertheless, you will seek to acquire this knowledge as quickly as possible, through your in-laws.

I read your letter with satisfaction. I extend my blessing to you and to your fiancé, that you may set your wedding at a fruitful moment, that it may be celebrated with happiness and enable you to build a Jewish home, founded on the Torah and the mitzvos*, as Chassidus* explains it, as well as on Chassidic customs and practices.

You write that you are not from a Chassidic family, but you should have no fear about this. According to the proverb of the Alter Rebbe*, author of the Tanya*, Chassidus* is addressed to the entire Jewish people. It is expressed and has been transmitted in a form that makes it accessible to each one, man or woman. All can put its teachings into practice in their daily existence. It suffices to want to, in order that Hashem grant the possibility and enable one to apply it in one's life.

We are preparing to celebrate the giving of the Torah in a few days. You no doubt know what the Midrash relates, reporting the word of Hashem to Moshe, who asked him to transmit the Torah first to the women. There is here a teaching applying, among Jews, in various domains.

When one is about to build a house, in particular — whether individual or collective — one should know that the responsibility for it rests essentially on the woman, who is the akeres habayis*, its essential aspect. Practice demonstrates incontestably that this is so. The conduct of the home, the chinuch* of the children in particular, and even the conduct of the husband depend on her.

A woman must therefore have full awareness of the mission incumbent upon her. And she may be certain that Hashem, Who awaits all this from her, gives her the strengths and the means, of which she can make use in her daily existence.

May Hashem help you to constitute your home and to adopt the conduct just defined. You will joyfully celebrate the festival of Shavuos*, then you will have, throughout the rest of the year, a life of Torah and mitzvos*.

For the Rebbe shlita*,

the secretary,